


If Only I Had The Strength

by Tatsuha21



Category: Voltron: Legendary Defender
Genre: Galaxy Garrison, M/M, Pining
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-08-28
Updated: 2019-08-28
Packaged: 2020-09-28 20:27:10
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,113
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20431946
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Tatsuha21/pseuds/Tatsuha21
Summary: Matt just started at the Galaxy Garrison and he’s already crushing hard on a certain hottie he saw at the gym. Can a scrawny nerd like him catch the attention of the most popular guy on campus? Maybe, if he builds up the confidence – and the muscle.





	If Only I Had The Strength

**Author's Note:**

> Written for Inseparable: A Shatt Zine

The time was 0800 hours on Matt’s third day on the Galaxy Garrison campus. Sleep still visible in the corners of his eyes, he yawned and stretched exaggeratedly. It was far too early to be awake in his opinion – especially on a_ Saturday _ – but if he had to be up at this ridiculous time, he wasn’t about to exert any additional energy trying not to show how tired he truly felt.

He couldn’t help the face he pulled as he trudged round the final corner and the door to the on-campus gym came into view. That’s where he was headed (against his will, he might add) for his mandatory induction.

If there was a number of times a new cadet could say “I will never _ ever _ use this gym” that could get them out of it, then Matt must have given up before reaching it. He’d tried his best, but the faculty staff had remained insistent he needed to complete it before classes began for the semester.

He had reluctantly conceded but he knew as he crossed the threshold into that noisy room full of machines and muscles that he’d never set foot in it again for as long he went here. He had much better things to be doing with his free time – like playing video games or sleeping in on his days off.

For a brief moment, he hoped the gym coach had forgotten their appointment and he could return to the comfort of his bed; but that small hope was quickly dashed as the woman approached from his left with the kind of friendly morning greeting only a regular early-riser could give. 

At her request, Matt stepped onto a vacant treadmill and glanced toward the machine next to him – where a girl with a ponytail was running at an impressive speed; a determined expression set on her features and perspiration glistening on her brow.

Just looking at the speed of the belt made him gulp, and subconsciously squeeze his own handgrips tighter as the one beneath his feet started to move too; but the pace was nothing more than a walking speed, so he let out a sigh of relief. At least she was starting him off easy.

The instructor upped Matt’s speed to a jog and then to a run. Already, his meagre muscles were protesting. They weren’t used to this much activity. What they were used to was sitting in a comfortable gaming chair and occasionally carrying him to the kitchen for snacks, or a sneaky slice of pie after everyone else had gone to bed.

But there was no sweet treat at the end of this exercise. The best thing he had to look forward to was flopping down on his bed after it was all over. He looked longingly towards the door, wishing that if he had to run at all, that he could run through it and never return.

As his slightly blurring vision rested on it, that door opened, and the bright smile of a handsome young man caught his attention. It wasn’t directed at him, but it still managed to steal what little air he had in his lungs.

This man was breath-taking – with his dark hair, defined jawline, and broad shoulders that Matt was convinced had to be almost twice the width of his. He couldn’t help but watch as the stranger made his way across the room, casually greeting and being greeted by almost every person he passed on his way to the weights stand.

Clearly, this was a very popular guy on campus; i.e. the sort Matt would never have a shot with – being the physically-weak, bespectacled nerd that he was. But it seemed his brain was lacking sense as well as oxygen because, before he could stop it, he felt himself already beginning to pine.

……

It was several days later when Matt lay awake in his bed for what was probably the third or fourth time that week, staring at the ceiling of his small dorm room; the image of Gym Guy’s bright smile playing over and over in his head. Why was he so hung up on some guy he’d only seen once and never even talked to? It was so unlike him.

But, _ man _, that guy was beautiful.

Matt really wanted to see him again but, sadly, he had attended every one of his classes and Gym Guy hadn’t been in any of them. He hadn’t seen the man anywhere around campus either, not that he’d admit he was keeping an eye out.

It seemed that if he wanted to see that guy again, he was going to have to do something he never thought he would – go _ willingly _to the gym.

……

Saturday morning had rolled around again when Matt poked his head into the campus gym for the second time, scanning the room for black hair and a bright smile. If there was one thing he knew about gym buffs, it was that they stuck to routines. So, if Gym Guy was there at this time last week, then there was a good chance he’d be there again today.

Matt spotted him on the other side of the room and his heart skipped a beat. He looked just as good as he had the last day – awake and fresh-faced despite the early hour; and a warm, friendly expression on his gorgeous face as he chatted to the guys on either side of him.

Trying not to make it too obvious, Matt made his way to a spot where he could easily watch the man train; stepping onto a nearby treadmill since it was the only machine he remembered how to operate. Somehow, all the rest had become a blur.

He found himself studying the man’s features as he upped his own speed to a light jog. Gym Guy had really soft-looking hair, he noted; admiring the fluffy part that dangled over his forehead, and the cute way his ears stuck out a bit more than average. It was endearing.

One of the guys said something Matt couldn’t make out, but he heard the laugh Gym Guy gave in response; the beautiful sound making his breath catch in his throat.

He didn’t know a laugh could make him feel so warm inside – or cause him to make such a goofy grin. He caught sight of it in one of the large mirrors and quickly wiped it off before anyone might question him. He wished he could make Gym Guy laugh like that, but he didn’t even have the courage to talk to the man, nevermind anything else.

Looking at the other guys there, Matt became painfully aware of how much he didn’t measure up to any of them – with their broad shoulders and bulging biceps and impressive upper body strength.

All he had was a pair of skinny arms and scrawny legs – not exactly what a gorgeous, fit, popular guy would be looking for in a boyfriend. Gym Guy wouldn’t take any notice of him as long as he looked like this.

…...

Algebra was not Katie’s strong suit, she finally conceded after twenty minutes of attempting the same problem and not getting the correct value for x. The rest of her advanced math class was going well, but this section just had her stumped.

Stuffing her pen into the textbook as a makeshift bookmark, she closed it and headed to her older brother’s room to ask for help, feeling lucky he’d come home this weekend.

She emerged from her messy room and heard a few grunts and the faint sound of Matt’s voice from across the hall. As she moved closer, those mumbles turned to discernible words.

“You must be tired – you’ve been running through my mind all night~”

Who was he talking to? Was that supposed to be _ flirting _?

Katie crept closer to the slightly ajar door and peered through the gap, spotting her brother with a small dumbbell in each hand, slowly raising one while his arm shook visibly under the strain. It was evident from his face just how much he was struggling, and she had to hold back a snicker. Small though she was, she was certain she could lift heavier than that.

As Matt finally brought the dumbbell to shoulder height, he locked eyes with himself in the mirror and smirked.

“There must be something wrong with my eyes – I can’t take them off y-”

_ THUD _

“FUCK!”

Katie pushed open the door, catching the attention of her brother who was clutching his aching toe as the dumbbell responsible rolled across the floor and slowed to a stop near her feet.

“Since when do _ you _ work out?” she asked, a teasing smirk on her lips as she leaned against the doorframe.

Matt’s face turned red as he wondered if his little sister had heard him.

“Um… well, fitness is important and all that…” He spotted the math textbook in her hand. “Did you need help with something?”

Katie regarded him for a moment, debating whether or not to let him away with changing the subject. In the end, she decided to let it slide. For now.

“Yeah, actually. I keep getting the wrong answer for question four and I don’t know where I’m going wrong. Can you help me?”

“Of course.”

Matt hobbled over to his desk as Katie plonked the heavy book down on it, his eyes scanning the question and the page of scribbled out calculations she had stuffed in beside it.

“Yeah, these ones are tricky at first, but once you get the hang of them, they’re super easy. First, you have to-”

“Who’s been running through your mind all night?”

“What?”

She couldn’t let it slide after all.

“I heard you talking to yourself in the mirror.” She smirked at him. “So, do you have a crush on someone~?”

Matt blushed again, returning his gaze to the textbook but only pretending to read it. When he finally looked up, his sister was still staring intently at him, that teasing smile still firmly plastered across her face.

He gave in and confessed the truth, but he kept his eyes off her; instead focusing on the pen he was fidgeting with.

“Just this cute guy I saw in the gym… I don’t even know his name.”

“So, what? You’re trying to get buff to impress him?”

“Pretty much…” He felt stupid even saying it.

“Why don’t you just talk to him? Wouldn’t that be easier?”

Katie just didn’t understand the situation. She’d never tried, nor cared, to talk to any of the popular boys or girls at her school. It was complicated.

“I… I can’t. He’s so popular and I’m just…” Matt looked down at his scrawny form. “I’m nothing… He’s completely out of my league.”

…...

The following Saturday, Matt was back at the gym – now with the knowledge that he could lift the smallest weights they had for enough reps to be considered ‘a set’. His arms still hurt from all the practice he’d done at home and in his dorm room in preparation for this, but he was determined to join the group of men down by the weight rack, and lift alongside Gym Guy.

He had a good feeling about today.

With the kind of confidence he usually only had in a science lab, he strode across the room and picked up the smallest barbell – which was equivalent to the dumbbells he’d been practising with – and found a space to start his set.

All the men around him were lifting much larger weights, and it would have made him feel self-conscious, had he been paying attention to them. But his gaze remained fixed on the door, waiting excitedly and expectantly for Gym Guy to walk through it.

As the time passed, his muscles grew tired and he thought about quitting, but then the door would open, and he would perk up again.

But, alas, it was never Gym Guy and his burst of energy quickly waned.

It was already past the time the man would usually leave, and still, he had yet to even arrive. Matt sighed in disappointment as he sat on the floor. He’d been taking more and more frequent rests as his arms became fatigued, but this one had stretched into a full ten minutes so now he was just some pathetic loser sitting on the floor.

His gaze drifted to the other men around him – towering over him with their huge muscles that looked ready to burst out of their tank tops.

Who was he trying to kid? He stood just as much a chance of getting Gym Guy’s attention whether the man was there to see him workout or not.

……

Matt tried not to dwell on that heavy ball of low self-esteem that was currently sitting at the bottom of his stomach. He had something good to look forward to after all – something that was much more his speed.

His dad would soon be heading on another Mars mission. It hadn’t even been announced publicly yet, but Matt had begged him to get a sneak peek at the mission details as soon as he’d received them – and he’d just gotten a text confirming they’d arrived.

As his dad’s office came into view, Matt spotted someone leaving it. The short, black hair and muscular build made him stop dead in his tracks. That looked like…

The person turned.

It was! It was Gym Guy!

Matt ducked out of sight and watched as the man walked past him, a smile on his beautiful face as he read over whatever piece of paper he had in his hand; then Matt slipped into the office once he was gone.

“Hey, Dad, who was that? That guy I just saw leaving your office?” he asked, trying to sound casual and nonchalant.

“Oh, that was Shiro. I told you about him.”

He certainly had. Sam spoke frequently and very highly of a Garrison pilot named Takashi Shirogane who was exceptionally gifted and praised for being the ‘youngest pilot ever to lead a mission into space’.

“Why do you ask?”

“Uh… no reason. I was just curious…” Matt didn’t want to tell his dad about his crush, especially now he knew who Gym Guy was. This guy was a legend. If he thought he had a slim chance before, it was practically microscopic now.

But that didn’t mean he was about to stop trying.

……

The next time Matt went to the gym, Shiro was already there, and already a few sets into his workout if the sweat glistening on his exposed skin was anything to go by. The spot next to him was miraculously open so Matt made a beeline for it, leaving his towel and water there to claim it before heading to the weight rack and wrapping his hands around the smallest barbell.

He paused, glancing over at Shiro and the impressive weight he was lifting. Matt knew he couldn’t manage something that big, but he _ could _ do better than last week. He picked the next size up – which was noticeably heavier – and headed back to his spot, struggling a little but determined to complete at least one set with it.

When he returned, Shiro was doing weighted squats and Matt became more keenly aware of just how thick and muscular the man’s thighs were, especially since he was wearing particularly tight shorts.

He kept his eyes on Shiro, letting the man’s impressive muscles distract him from his own aching ones as he struggled through his set.

They finished at the same time, and the other knelt down to place his bar on the floor, his head turning Matt’s direction and making the boy’s heart skip a beat. Maybe this would be the moment their eyes would meet and maybe Shiro would like something about him and want to talk to him.

No such luck.

Shiro had grabbed his water bottle, chugged down almost half of it, and the moment he’d lowered it, someone else had caught his attention.

It was the man who’d been training on Shiro’s other side – taller and buffer than even Shiro himself, and he had an air of confidence that Matt couldn’t even dream of possessing; able to stand in such a popular guy’s personal space without so much as a blush or fidgeting fingers.

And Shiro was making no effort to push him away. He seemed to be welcoming the attention, and it filled Matt with jealousy.

He returned to the rack; letting the feeling fuel him as he grabbed a barbell he should not have been able to lift. He’d been trying to catch Shiro’s attention for _ weeks _ already. He wasn’t about to be put out of the running before he even got a chance to play.

That determination was the only thing that got him back to his mat. His arms felt ready to drop off; protesting every step of the way until he had no choice but to set the weight down and roll it the final few feet to the centre.

He took a few seconds to catch his breath, but no longer than that. The man talking to Shiro was getting even closer; probably about to ask him out at any moment.

Matt stepped into position with his legs apart, bent down and gripped the bar tightly; sucking in a deep breath as he did so. He could do this. He had to.

Slowly and steadily, he managed to lift it – to knee height, then to waist height, and then to shoulder height. He was just about to raise it further when suddenly it slipped from his grasp. Too fast for his eyes to process, he felt it collide with his knee, making the joint give way; the busy room rushing past him in a blur.

When he regained his senses, he was on his back on the floor. He tried to get up but there was something cold and heavy pressing down on him, preventing him from doing so. He was trapped under his own barbell.

He tried squirming his way free but couldn’t. Every time he moved, his knee was in agony. He started to panic, but then a gentle voice caught his attention.

It was Shiro – right in front of him, kneeling over him and peering worriedly into his eyes; the closeness and firm eye contact making a blush creep up onto Matt’s cheeks.

The man reached out and grasped the barbell, easily lifting it off him and setting it aside.

“Are you ok?”

Matt just stared for a moment until he could find the strength to speak.

“I-I’m fine,” he mumbled, feeling self-conscious about how pathetic he probably looked lying there on the floor. He tried to push himself up into a sitting position but suddenly yelped out in pain.

“Where does it hurt?”

“My knee,” Matt answered, nodding towards the right one.

Shiro gently wrapped his hands around it, thumbs pressing down a little. The touch was slight, but still, it made Matt wince in pain.

“I think we should go to the medical bay and get this seen to. Here, let me help you up.”

He placed his strong hands under Matt’s arms, hoisting the boy to his feet and making all his cognitive processes cease.

This was actually happening. Shiro was holding him!

……

When they finally reached the med bay, Matt was relieved. He hadn’t been able to hold back the whimpers that accompanied every step. Shiro had offered multiple times to carry him the rest of the way, but he had steadfastly refused. His heart was already pounding in his chest from being pressed flush to Shiro’s side. He didn’t think it could handle being carried in his arms.

The man helped him to sit and explained the situation to the nurse, who nodded and asked Matt for his name.

“Matthew Holt,” he told her, and she scribbled it down on her clipboard before telling them she’d fetch the doctor.

“Matthew Holt?” Shiro asked, recognising the name. “As in Commander Holt’s son?”

“Uh…yeah… That’s me.”

Shiro laughed.

“I’ve heard a lot about you from Sam. He always talks about how talented you are at computer coding. He’s shown me some of your work. It’s really impressive.”

Matt blushed at the praise.

“I knew you were starting this year,” Shiro continued. “I was actually really hoping I’d get to meet you. I didn’t think it’d be in the gym though.” He chuckled. “From what your dad told me, I thought that’s the last place we’d run into each other.”

“Well, that’s because I never went before. I actually only started going a few weeks ago,” Matt admitted with a nervous laugh.

“I can tell. If you want, I can give you some pointers to help you get your technique right, and let you know when you’re ready to start lifting heavier. That bar you had today was too much for you right now. You need to build your way up to it.”

“Thank you.” Matt twiddled with his thumbs, debating whether or not to come clean. “It doesn’t matter though. I don’t think I’ll go back.”

Shiro looked at him questioningly.

“To be honest, Shiro, I hate going to the gym. I hate exercise. I hate getting all sore and sweaty. I’d rather be in my bed on Saturday mornings. The only reason I was at the gym all those times…” He took a deep breath. “…was so you might notice me.”

Face feeling hot from the admission, he slowly looked up at the man beside him, noticing that Shiro’s cheeks were just as red.

They stared at each other for a long moment, both on the verge of saying something, but then the nurse returned and whatever had been on their minds was left unsaid.

……  


Matt left the med bay with a cast on his right leg and a pair of crutches for support. He didn’t need Shiro to hold him up anymore, but the man insisted on walking him back to his dorm room anyway. _ “Just in case,” _ he had said.

Now, they were at the dorm room door as Matt fumbled for his keycard; Shiro placing a steadying hand on him when he almost overbalanced.

“I’ll help you over to the bed,” he offered, and Matt thought about saying “no”. He’d finally managed to get chatting with his crush. He didn’t want to throw it all away now by letting the man see what his room contained.

But, truthfully, he could use some help, so he pushed open the door and Shiro let out a gasp.

“Now, _ this _ is the Matt Holt your dad described!” he exclaimed, looking all around the room in wonder – at the nerdy posters on every wall, the space print on the bedding, the assortment of collectibles dotted over every horizontal surface – his gaze finally resting on a figurine to his left, running a finger over the diecast metal as he remarked that he had one just like it.

Matt was taken aback.

“Y-you like stuff like this?”

“I do. Actually… that’s the other reason I hoped I’d meet you…” Shiro confessed, blushing as he noticed the boy looking right at him. “Come on, let’s get you settled.”

He led Matt over to the bed and helped him get comfortable, propping a pillow under his injured leg; his hand lingering on the cast a little too long.

“So… you really kept coming to the gym just because you liked me?”

Matt looked away.

“Yeah… I know it sounds pretty stupid. I jus-”

“No, I think it’s cute.”

His heart started thumping. When had Shiro gotten so close to him? His face was mere inches away.

“And I think you’re really cute too,” Shiro continued, voice little more than a whisper.

Matt barely had time to process the sentence before he felt lips against his, soft and gentle; his eyes fluttering closed as he leaned into it too. He felt a hand in his hair, still damp from the gym, but Shiro didn’t seem to mind so he decided he didn’t either.

“Matt…” Shiro breathed as he pulled away, his thumb caressing the other’s cheek.

“Yes, Shiro?”

“When your leg is better, would you like to go on the nerdiest date imaginable?”

Matt choked out a laugh.

“As long as I get to spend time with you, and I don’t have to lift anything heavy.”

“I promise,” Shiro grinned. “The only thing I’ll make you hold is my hand.”

“Y’know,” Matt started, matching the other’s smug grin. “You’re really not as cool as I thought you were… but I like this better.”


End file.
